"I'm just now finding out

What it was all about"
Oh, Ben Folds, what you do to meeeee.
I really miss Anna. I feel like lately she's my true friend. She's been my best friend for about four-five years or so? And it's funny because when I moved when I began highschool everyone surely thought I was going to be the one to adjust the easiest. And that my sister would have the hard time.
And honestly I didn't think it would be that hard for me. But it turned out I had the hardest time and Katie had it easier. I remember that first summer, the only reason I used aim was so that I could talk to Anna and Hayley and Becca in the woodlands. I would sit on my computer until they signed on just so I would have someone to talk to and something to do.
Then school began and things shifted, I made friends and made changes in my life, grew up and changed physiclly. And still through it all, Anna was soley there for me. The first year was so horrible for me. I hated every minute, every second of my first year. And Anna was there through all of it for me.
I lost contact with Becca because of dumb reasons. Reasons that were childish and I realize that now, but at the time didn't. And not long after, I was still friends with Hayley, but we just didn't talk as much.
I feel like even though there's been four hours of distance straining and between Anna's and my friendship, that we have only become closer. And everyone always says that when I come home to see them that it's like I was never even gone.
Now three, almost four years have passed and it's hard to believe it's even been somewhat that long.
I will say this always and forever, I will probably never think of Flower Mound as home, merely a place to reside.
I really miss Anna. I can't even put it into words. I have friends here, but as I have noticed lately, it's like they forget about me, and don't care enough about my friendship to them to keep it up. So I just sit on the back burner now, and I'm really okay with going to school and coming home everyday. I know not everyone agrees with the way I feel about things here, and that's okay. I never expected everyone to love me when I moved here, but I've put in three years+ of effort and no one can say I haven't tried.
I talked to Brendan for a whole class period on friday and we talked about how we don't like to be pessimistic but we had to face it, we honestly hate living here. Hate's a strong word, but it's honestly how we, I, feel.
I don't care where and how I end up in life as long as I have the people who I care about most (Anna and Sarge) surounding me and I'm not in North Texas.
I kind of like having no friends. As weird as that is.
I like going to class anonymously.
I mean I have plenty of aquaintince friends. Who I eat lunch with, talk to during class time, walk to classes with, and such. But I like not having to deal with things. The way I see friendship, it should be just two people hanging out, caring about each other, taking responsibility for each other, and taking loyalty to be behind someone. Friendship shouldn't have to be a struggle, and friendship shouldn't be dreaded. I know that there's hardships to go through, but not everyday should be a continuing hardship.
And honestly, that's what My friendship with Anna has been.
I wouldn't know what to do if I didn't have her there for me. She's everything I need in my best friend and I wouldn't trade her for anything, how glorious it may be, for anything.
I guess, my point is, I'm sick of wasting years of my life on building friendships that aren't there for the best.
I don't want to invest time into something that's going to stab me in the back, and their intent isn't for the best of the both of us.
I'm not trying to say, I'm not open to more friendships, I just want friendships that are good and solid. That care and are loyal. That honor me another in the same way I honor other people.
I know that no one will ever be as good as Anna, because I hold her so high, I will never find another one of her, but she's a good model. And I'd just like to know people with the same outlook of having and honest true "friendship".

Sometimes I ask too much. Hah

Till death

do us part?

I went to my cousin's wedding this weekend. oh boy.

I don't really like weddings all that much. its just an excuse to play sappy love songs from the ninties.

It's a bittersweet night at weddings.

Nonetheless, the night was beautiful, it was outside in this gorgeous green backyard. with the prettiest gazebo. it was a candelit marraige. a really small congregation, only immediate family and a few friends. they shared a moonlit kiss before everyone proceeded inside. we all took family pictures then headed across the hall for the reception.

Of course, my father and mother were the first in line for the bar. My dad got everyone drinks and was back in line in a matter of one minute after leaving the first time. He ended up talking to one of Cassie's friends, Matt, a hairdresser, peirced in every body part possible and my dad ended up making friends with him. Then after everyone got drunk, and the cake was cut, everyone was fed, THE RAP MUSIC EXTRAVAGANZA BEGAN. and against my will, i made a complete fool of myself. haha. Ended up dancing to Usher's "Yeah" with the family and dirty dancing with them. Haha, taught Bill Green to bump and grind. and I felt bad for the 20 something year old who got stuck dancing with my family. But everyone was in high spirits so it didn't really matter.

We drove home around midnight and my dad blasted Led Zeppelin. Haha. Weird.

And on the ride home, I felt really lonely.
I realized how special it is to have a significant other in your life.
I forgot how good it feels to be loved.

I tried not to dwell on it for too long and passed out the minute I laid down in my bed.

The next day, went home and attended the after wedding party at my Aunt Sherry's house.

Ended up getting drunk with Will and talking to random people.

I sat down for about an hour or two and talked to the 20 something year old who we danced with last night. Turns out he's just a friend of my cousin's and was invited to come. He's not even that good of friends with her, but the Green family loves him. We talked about our lives, the wedding, and how we didn't like them, how they brought back memories. And we talked about our past relationships. He told me how he dated a girl for a year, and she cheated on him like 10 times, but he loved her so much he just kept on forgiving her and taking her back. I told him all about Justin and our two year "relationship" and how I feel like I just can't get over him. How everything reminds me of him and it just never stops.

And then I realized I just need to get over him.
I should've never dated Kyle when I did. It wasn't fair or right to do that to Kyle. I couldn't be everything he wanted/needed, because all of me wasn't there to give to him. It's not that I still wanted/needed Justin, it's just my "heart was still broken" and not mended enough to begin a new relationship. My whole heart wasn't there to care for Kyle. Believe me, I cared alot about him and I really did want to be with him, but I just couldn't make everything perfect the way he wanted it to be. I wasn't ready for a serious relationship again and fucked it up. I was too cramped, held down. I needed my own time and space. I was held down for two years (not badly) and I needed a breather time. And I didn't take that. I jumped out of one relationship and into a new one. I thought that dating Kyle would help me move on and I would learn to love someone else, but it only made it harder. I was so confused and I wanted so badly to take Kyle into part of my life but I didn't know how because my heart just wouldn't let me. It's not that I wanted Justin's realtionship and partnership back, it's that I truly hadn't gotten over it. I had left things in my mind undone. I left things unexplained. And hanging. It wasn't right to do that to anyone, and before I knew it I got in too deep.
I really liked kyle, and I really wanted our relationship to work, but I was always somewhere else trying to work things out.
I was mostly afraid, worried, and scared, to let me inhibitions go and letting someone care for me, for fear it would perish again.
I don't like that feeling, of trusting someone and letting them into my life, to only have them ripped away from me. I don't like feeling let down and torn apart. So I held back, and ended up making someone else feel that way.

And I'm truly sorry for that.
I wish I could do or say something to make it all better and to make hard feelings go away. I know that all of this happened like two months ago, but I've just been so upset at myself. For doing the one thing I tried not to let happen happen.

I apologize a million more times.
From the bottom of my heart.

I honestly don't think I will ever get over my two year relationship. Not when I'm still best friends with him, not when I see him so often and not when we are so apart of each other's lives. I can honestly say I loved him more than anyone, (except anna hehe) and probably will for a while. Until someone changes that.

I want to be able to move on, and I'm working on that alot right now.
I want to know someone who will actually be okay with letting me take things slow and take my time and who understands this.

Blah! If you're that person, somewhere out there, introduce yourself haha.

Hurray Hurray

"I'm your silver lining, hurray hurray, but now I'm gold"

I lived for the good in your life, to make you look good, to make you happy.
Now I'm living for myself and making myself happy.

"i never felt so wicked, as when i willed our love to die."

2250, I made a 2250! It's the only thing to make me smile for the week.
Maybe now more grants so I can go to the university. I pray and I hope.

xy

Sometimes I wonder if I would've been a better child had I stayed in Houston.
I really think so.
Honest to god, I think I would've been less fucked up, done less shady things and I would've been a better daughter/person.

The only reason I get "fucked up" is because it leads me not to think about Anna and the Woodlands and all that I'm missing and how lonely I am.

Don't get me wrong, I have tonsssss of friends here. But I still feel extremely empty inside and a million friends can never compare to one anna, to one best friend, with me through thick and thin.

I wouldn't be breathing today had it been for her, I would be sitting in a grave, maybe watching from the heavens.
And I have that to thank her for. So much more than any gratitude could hold.
<3 A.C.H.

Empty

I'm so scared.

That's it.

No brain

Sleeping in your car sucks. Sucks really bad. 'Specially when it's freezing outside.

I remember sitting on the floor with the lights off, sprawled out in my third grade class. My teacher, Mrs. Bosley, read us books every week. They were never books I had heard of though and little did I know being only 8, that each book she picked out was to affect us later on in life.
I remember around the beginning of autumn and october, she read to us a book about a little boy who was living a terrible life.
How people had enslaved him, taken him from his home, killed his family, took his house, took him from his country, and so on and so forth.
Turns out the man who did it to him was Christopher Columbus.

con·tro·ver·sy /ˈkɒntrəˌvɜrsi; Brit. also kənˈtrɒvərsi/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[kon-truh-vur-see; Brit. also kuhn-trov-er-see] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation
–noun, plural -sies.
1. a prolonged public dispute, debate, or contention; disputation concerning a matter of opinion.
2. contention, strife, or argument

She challenged what every other 3rd grade curriculum page said about Christopher Columbus and tried to show us how everyone's opinion isn't necessarily correct.

I applaud her for that now.

It seems that's what our generation is really about; Controversy.
Unfortunately, I do not know what is right and wrong.
It seems to be what we think is right is wrong, and what we think is wrong is right.
And sometimes I think people just see it like that, because they want to be different, not because they truly believe in their cause.

My head is searching for something reliable to grasp onto.
SOCIETY DO YOUR MAGIC AND LET THAT HAPPEN.
I'm not trying to say that I can't think for myself. But it's almost like whenever I voice my opinion, it has to automaticly be challenged, and for once I would like someone to just talk to me about my opinion and understand why I think the way I do, and share with me theirs.

I just want knowledge.
Too much to ask?

Perspectives

Right now, I am just trying to put my life into perspectives, or perhaps a new perspective.
Things this week have gotten so messed up and it shook me up really badly.
I think what I needed, or need right now, are some really good solid people and good friends to keep by me for the next couple of months or year.
I'm really glad that even though everyone, not necessarily ditched me, but put me off last night, I still had something to do to take my mind of everything.
I went to denton and hung out with Taylor again and the night was really eventful. Ha, stealing his roomate's stuff, squating, the pep rally, and screaming on the elevator. Haha, it was quite entertaining.
Except for when he got in trouble and written up, ha, and then the assholes come to the room to ask if we smoked in there. What bitches. His neighbors told on him, because his asthma was acting up. Little girl! It was two puffs. Jesus.
But the whole scenario was really funny when we thought about it. They even said they were going to call the cops just because Taylor went on every floor screaming "go unt go eagles" and ringing the bell. School spirit is such a crime.

This morning I woke up at 1. And I honestly think that even though I hate sleeping in, it put me in the best mood. I really needed time to escape from my life, and I think that sleeping lately has been the only way to do that. I think sleeping and the weather has kept me intact. It seems like, dare I say God, is looking out for me. Despite my horrible mood and thoughts, he made this fucking beautiful week and has made me cheer up. I cleaned out my room today and even packed all my shit up. Good feeling actually.
Now I plan to just go take a shower in my new bathroom with the little window in the tub that lets the sunlight shine it. It's so relaxing. I'm really proud of it.
I still haven't spoken to my parents except to tell them that I was leaving last night to go out, not that they really cared, because I received no response, but oh well.
I can't help someone's childness.
But I did notice that someone switched money over to my account today.
And judging by the amount and the account number from the transfer, it was my own mother.
Put a little bit of hope in me.
Maybe she's scared too, but maybe what they're doing to me is for the best. And I will learn something.

Who knows anymore?

Invisible

Don't worry I won't have to be apart of anything anymore, because I can't be.
Due to the lack of common curteousy, all my personal information has been looked through by my parents.

So of course they disaprove.

So I really don't know what to do.

According to my dad, he doesn't even want me to go to college anymore, because of the finiancial burden I am to him. And as soon as I become a legal adult he just assumes I drop out by myself because it would save so much trouble and he thinks I'm already headed that way.

Since I have no means of communication anymore besides this computer, I guess the only time I can see anyone, is from 8-5 my school hours.

Sorry if you don't understand, because I don't either and I just know I'm punished.
And I'm happy for you that it's your lucky day if you dislike me and don't have to deal with me anymore.

Glad You're Vindicated

I'm so sick of someone constantly bitching and moaning and complaining about me to me.
Why don't they just seperate already, all I ever hear when I get home is yelling about the pettinest business. Does anyone ever think that no one ever really wants to hear it? Especially someone who lives there twenty-four-seven?

Today just wasn't the best. I was called downstairs from studying only to be blamed for everything that's out of place and has gone wrong in the past week. Oh for heaven's sake, please take responsibility for your own actions. They want me to protray in my actions the role of a muture adult, but obviously it's inimatetive when they themselves cannot protray one.
I really like how I was scolded for thirty minutes about how I am such a slob and leave a huge mess in the morning for someone to come home to and clean up. Well I'm glad as this whole "argument", that lacked the other side, was taking place, the real person to blame sat there in silence. Glad you're vindicated you sorbid bitch. Glad that I took the blame for something that I'm never convicted of. Thanks a whole lot for sticking up for me when you know that if you so much as uttered one word, every line of disgust that was shown toward me would've been taken away.
So as I sat there at the table during our dinner with a little bit of hostility towards you, I don't think you had one right to be altered by it.
I also love the fact, that somehow my grade point average of a 3.8 doesn't mean anything, but the fact that I have a current average of a 71 means that I am some sort of devilish creature. Sorry that I can't understand something and that I am so preoccupied with all sorts of things you make me collaborate with that I don't have time to perfect an art. I apologize that I am so sleep deprived and that when I walk in and sit through an hour and half long class that is so soporific I don't exactly catch on because I drift off. I really do apologize for my lack of motivation, because as you know, "I don't give a rats ass" and a "Filled future doesn't mean a thing" to me. Oops, you got me.

And please don't even begin to flatter yourself and say that I make all decisions only on the basis of spite towards you! I would never act out of spit, nor ever make a decision that revolved anywhere around you and your thoughts. Ha! I laugh at your complete ignorance. I make decisions based on my likes/dislikes/outlooks/perspectives ect.

And I just want to know, why you're not even slighted by the notion that your son is on scholastic probation, but a mere 71, which happens to be an advanced class counting as an 81, makes you build up enough steam to run for eight miles.

So after I cleaned up your filthy pigsty of a kitchen, made your dinner, and the once again cleaned up after you, and proceeded to the stairs to finish my studies and my duties as a student I gladly said my de rien's with as much spite in my heart.
Because that's just how I work you know.

Grey Skies

Ahhhh, So good to be home. It's strange how much things change yet stay the same. Just got done with a badly needed three day weekend and I couldn't have spent it much better or with better people.
On Friday night Tanner and I waited to see Majid come home from Las Vegas. Then we traveled up to The Mills to see Cass at work, where finally she has put in her two weeks notice! No more bitch work! Now it makes me realize how much I need a job, considering I have depleted my bank account to a whole savings of 13$, go me.
I came home pretty early because I decided sleep was much needed to be able to wake up at 6 a.m. the next morning to start my trip to see good old friends.
On saturday woke up, took a really hot shower, which made my throat feel better, and then packed everything I thought I would need for my trip. As usual, procrastinating to the very last second! Who would've thought? Then put everything in the car, and set off. Got into houston around 12 and went to go stop to see my bro Will for lunch. Which was eeeehh. I met the town drunk while we went to go get some gas,which was as ever entertaining. hahaha. He told me he would make me a tee-shirt with a cupcake on it. Since he works for a "cooommpaanniiiieeeeee" now. Ahhahaha, man Regie was his name. Hahah. Then I went on down to the Woodlands and started my weekend offf the right way! Anna and Hayley greeted me at the door and in the first five seconds we all agreed I should move back ahah. As usual. We sat around and watched tv and decided what we should do that night. And we decided a much needed movie trip to see "Across the Universe".
Then we all piled into Taylor's truck that Anna has taken over and went over to Eric's house to watch him play Halo 3. Seems like I do that alot lately. Haha.
Then Anna and I dropped Hayley off at her house so she could get ready for her dinner with the family and headed over to Walgreen's to pick up a 3 pound bag of twizzlers,ha, which I might add is the neatest thing. They're so long!
We went over to the park next to see Christian and hang out with him. We realized how stupid rich kids are when he could make some deal for 30 dollars more than he needed too. Ha, oh well, it was the kid's parent's money anyways. and the woodlands parents deffinitely aren't lacking in that aspect.
Then Justin picked me up and we headed over to Best Buy to pick out a movie, Knocked Up, and then drove over to Market Street to meet up with the whole crew and see the movie.
Ha, I met James, Hayley's Boyfrannn. And we all watched the movie together. I forgot to tell Justin that the movie was a musical, which he didn't find very pleasing, and told me if he had known he would'nt have even agreed to coming. Thanks doll.
We went to go eat at Whataburger afterwards, mm, and tried to get everyone together for a much needed smoking of the hooka, but no one was doing anything so Anna and I ended up going home, where I passed out too easily on the new couch!
The next day we woke up to go get doughnuts and decided to be cool and drive all the way to Old Town Spring, where we spent a whole twenty minutes and got one snow cone! We ended up driving back and residing at Andrew's to watch some more Halo 3 with Eric, Christian, Andrew, Craig and Taylor. Where as no surprise, I fell asleep in Andrew's bed in less than 20 minutes. It was so neat, one of those commercial beds where you can raise it to your comfort! Loved it.

We wanted to go to Mel's for dinner since Anna and I were dying from starvation so we drove out to tomball only to find that they close early on Sundays!!! Nooo. So we ended up at Chili's haha. Yum.
Afterwards Anna and I met up with Leo, Diego, Andy, Brennon and his girlfriend and headed off into houston for a haunted evening! So fun, minus the getting lost on the way there. Rude people we followed.
Once we got there Anna and I pretty much humped Diego because we clinged so tightly to him from behind. We then decided a Hooka bar was much needed so we drove to 1960 and ended up at the Po Boy's Deli. Oh no, what an adventure. We made Diego go to the window to see if it was open and he got inside, where he stood and casually walked around and saw no one. Then he came out got inside the car and told us to haul ass because he set off the alarm. We wondered why he sat inside so long and he explained since he's mexican he's already known for robbing things so he had to play it off cool. Hahah.
Diego ended up making me sit in the back with him where he proceeded in licking my face numerous times and telling me the stupidest pick up lines. So sad, he hasn't changed a bit from 8th grade communications.
We headed back to the woodlands where we dropped Diego and Leo off and headed to finally, GET SOME HOOKA. This time we really did. Third time's the charm baby.
We hookaed at Ty's house with all the kids there for about an hour and half then headed home.
The next morning Anna had to go to work and we said our goodbyes.
I was left in the house by myself and yes, I ended up crying because I miss her so much. Ugh, four hours away and still best friends, distance has done nothing to us, but bring us closer. Fuck you time lapse.
I do hate the distance though.
Then I had a much needed rendevous with a good old buddy of mine hehe. We fooled around and it felt good to be in someone's arms again. Although as usual I ruined it with my thinking. Ugh I wish my mind didn't get in the way of things, I wish I could forget the past and just move on, I wish I could start new. And not have anything stop me from doing what my body, and I want to! I felt so horrible yet so good at the end of our time.
Then I started my trip back to dallas.

Monday night I had a hangout time with Taylor, who I haven't seen in so long! Good stuff, went to subway and headed back to steal his dormmate's booze and have a "taste test".
Haha, which only to be ruined by remembering that Online homework was due at ten and it was 9. Haha, so extremely buzzed (damn you lightweight) I tried to drive home where I got so confused and upset and ended up hitting the side of a bridge ( no dammage to car somehow?!). I finally called Adam and he helped me concentrate and get home where Mom was waiting for me with dinner and such. Always can count on her, I love her so dearly.

The wandered upstairs only to find I lost the paper with my sign in name from Online Assignments so I just stopped trying. Then Talked to Adam about things on the phone, glad I did. Became more obliterated as the night moved on and finally passed out at 10:30. So early!

Now here I am, putting off science assignments where I expect to fail the test tomorrow.
Joy.
Love the life I live.

Traffic Spike

So as I rode with Cassi and our good coffee to Highland Village to turn in applications, we conversed about how much I get walked all over by every single one of our friends and how they do that because they know I'm not going to pick a fight about every single thing. But now it has suddenly reached a point of where I am taken advantage of every single day.
Don't get me wrong, I am no selfish bitch, I do things for people all the time, give them money regardless of the fact that currently I have no employment so my bank account is depreciating, give people rides, give people rides to pick up illegal things, risk my ass to get arrested for people, constantly take the blame for others. And I'm okay with that, because I love to make someone else happy and know that I did something to make their day easier. But there comes a point where it's all take take take and consistently no give.
That's where I draw the line.
This week, I have been pushed wayyyy to far. Two incidents have really pushed me over the edge. Im not a hog in any way, and I always always share regardless of how much I have left or how much I need, I make due with circumstances, and I ALWAYS share. Never greedy about food, drinks, smokes, clothes, shoes, cd's, supplies, anything. But there comes a point where you just cant keep taking from me just because you know I will never say no.
And there's also just something called common courtesy. The common sense rule of leaving other people's things alone. Don't touch something that isn't yours, don't take without asking, and deffinitely do not rummage through other people's belongings. And that's just manners.

So when I come to find out that:
A. I have been taken advantage of
B. My personal belongings have been messed and looked through
C. Personal things, spent with my personal money (not that my parents give to me) have been taken.

I think I have a little bit of a right to be pissed off.
PARTY FOWL.
You know I've lent one single person over 45$ and yet they have never repaid me? Hm, that seems a little sketchy. And do you know the majority of that money has gone to drugs? Hm, little bit irritating. And when I gave them 15 to buy me something, and they didn't they kept it. And at first I said, "okay keep it because if you're able to buy it for me again, you will have money" but they never had that chance again. And today I really needed that money, because I was broke and I needed to buy something. So I asked for it back.
And the fucking rudest response was given to me. Telling me I was lying that I gave them 15$. Are you a fucking joke? Wow, the nerve someone must have to say that to me. And then the fact that they actually got angry with me and tried to show me up and make me look dumb and got irritated with me. Oh sorry, for taking your money (actually mine) that you use to do something illegal? Oh excuse me, I didn't mean to jepordize that. Re-Dic-U-Lous.
And yeah, I did get my fifteen dollars from them, like hell I would take no for an answer.
And I really didn't appreciate the text messages that I recieved asking if I really lended them fifteen dollars. Wow, has the pot gone to your brain?

Haha, and then I really loved how on saturday, I bought a completely new pack. With my money. And smoked 1 cigarette. One, just one, uno, un, one. And I left my bag in Preston's car because I didn't want to take it into the dance. And I left it in the confidently that it my belongings would be safe and no harm would be done, so that I could have my stuff back the way it was. Well, when I got my stuff back on tuesday morning, I noticed as I went through my bag, that coincidently, my pack was gone. Hmmm. Somehow that leaves me to believe that one of the three people who also rode in that car must be in possession of it. So I asked around and found out that yes, the same person who I lend all my money too has my pack! Ha, and not only that but smoked them! When they were high! All of them! Except two! of my pack, purchased with my money!

What a good joke right!? Yesss.

Well here's a big fuck you.
Cause I'm no fucking ground to just be walked all over anymore.
Go ahead and ask me for anything. Sorry the answer is no, someone just ruined it for the rest of you. No more gratitude for anyone.

I'm a fucking traffic spike from now on.
You can do the right thing for me and I will lead you no harm, or you can try to walk over me back and forth and be ripped to shreds.

Your choice homeslice.

One Mark Off

Unfortunately today was no wear near exciting. But I did manage to stay awake for the majority of my classes. In the beginning of her horrible lectures about nothing in algebra class, I did begin to slip off away from reality. Since I sit on the floor in that class, it's not hard to. Colton made some girl in our class cry. It was actually kind of amusing just because it's sad how easily people break.
He constantly makes fun of me in that class and gives me a hard time, but I just tell him to shutup and we respect each other because of it. Actually haven't beat each other in that class yet, which I'm surprised, and he hasn't yet gotten on my nerves. In fact we actually work together on homework and talk and such. Which is odd. But, on the other note, the girl didn't understand anything we were going over about the quadratic functions and so our unqualified of a teacher asked her what she didn't comprehend and she shot back "WELL I DON'T WANT TO ASK BECAUSE WHEN I DO COLTON WILL JUST MAKE FUN OF ME". Sadly I laughed when she said this because it really was funny. Colton looked at me and he laughed along too. And about twenty minutes later we were copying down things off the board and I told Colton he should ask for an apology because that hurt his feelings. So he proceeded to get his apology and when he asked for it, she began to bawl. Haha, it was quite sad. And I felt rude because I was partially an acomplice in that. But on the other hand, it was a joke, and people should lighten up.

Once again I slacked off in my test taking skills class. Hahaha and once again my score went down like 300 points to a 1760. Awesome, oh well it's not even worth my GPA so why do I care right? But it still in discouraging to see how much I don't care when the first week, when I knew nothing I made the highest score I've ever been capable of.

The best part of the day had to have been after Cassi came out to her car where I was waiting and we decided to go be slobs and pig out on disgusting fast food. Mmmm, sonic. Where I managed to get all of my food completely on me and I dumped my chicken poppers all over her seat, aha which was amusing to the whole parking lot of sonic when we tried to clean it up. "Julie, what the fuck my mom's going to flip a dick when she see's this" I start laughing, "Julie why are you laughing it's not funny, i'm going to get in trouble because of you" me, "you said flip a dick" Ha, yes I'm mature I know.

Once again Dad's at another "golf tournament" so Mom and I are having dinner by ourselves yet again. But afterwards we plan to go to Highland Village and shop around.

I left my pack of cigarettes in Preston's car :( No pack for a week, not to mention my money, and new makeup. What a let down.